A few years ago I began to question: how well has this victim – oppressor worldview worked for me? Being a fighter has at times cost me more than I wanted to pay in the form of lost friendships, lost jobs and lost energy. It has, however, had some benefits. It helped me forge alliances and connect with other people at times. Granted these alliances were based on our shared status as victims and/or our common enemies. Another benefit of this worldview is the sense of self-righteousness that accompanies ongoing warfare. Mostly I refused to give up my role as a fighter because I believed that I if I wasn’t a fighter I would merely be a victim, with no choice but to succumb to abuse.
Are these the only two choices: to succumb to abuse or fight back? Is it possible to see people who act in ways that are harmful to me not as enemies but as fellow human beings struggling to get through life the best way they know how? Is it possible to graciously accept the things that happen to me, the good and the bad, without resistance or anger? These are the questions that resonated with me when I decided to start this blog.
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