I'm still processing this whole Ph.D. thing, I hope to move on soon, I'm starting to get bored. I keep thinking about something one of my committee members said after they voted to approve my dissertation. He said that now I have to deal with the "impostor syndrome." This was not the first time I heard the phrase.
Some college professors, particularly those who belong to the first generation in their families to be educated, experience this sense that they don't belong in academia. One of my professors mentioned that she sometimes dreams that "they" come to take her degree away.
Once you get the degree you are expected to play a certain role. If you play it well others may not even know that you are playing a role. The truth may even remain hidden from your conscious mind. But it is always lurking there. The truth. You are an impostor.
I guess I decided somewhere along the way that I wasn't willing (or perhaps able) to play this role. There is a price to pay for this forfeiture. But there are also rewards. I don't have to worry about impostor syndrome.
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