Monday, April 5, 2010

Day 93

Some days really suck!

Three days before my dissertation defense and I received a two and a half page (single spaced) critique from one of my committee members - just a few concerns that need to be addressed (yea right). What I really wanted was a gold star.

When I came back to school 5 years ago what I wanted was support and guidance and encouragement. I soon discovered that graduate school is not the place to get those things. I have worked on letting go of that expectation. But this morning when I opened that email, more than anything, I wanted to hear "good job." I wanted a pat on the back. I wanted resounding applause. Graduate school is firmly grounded in a process of critique - it is meant to shape us into scholars. Right now it just feels mean.

Graduate school does not promote good mental health - just ask Ted Kaczynski.

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