We had scarcely said, "Good morning" before Bill and I were locked in debate over the relative merits of logic as a tool in argumentation. Bill, clinging to modernist roots was not swayed by my post-modern assertions. I can hear the yawns as I write this. Certainly many people would not enjoy the discussion of esoteric ideas the way we do but it is one of the hallmarks of our relationship.
I have always loved ideas. I love to hold hold them up to the light, turn them around to examine every side, and lob them across the net in a volley of discussion. Unfortunately, for much of my life, I used them as weapons. Sometimes I would defeat my enemy through skillful rhetorical jabs. Other times I was mortally wounded in verbal fencing matches.
I made the mistake of thinking that I was my ideas and my ideas were me. I tried to gain acceptance and respect by selling others on the merits of my worldview. Validation (or was it love) was the prize at stake in every round of debate. I used ideas to build walls instead of bridges.
Today, I am learning to debate recreationally, not as a dual to the death. I am learning to listen more and hold on loosely to my beliefs. Beliefs, after all are like soap bubbles created by our minds. They are fun to look at but seldom hold any real substance.
No comments:
Post a Comment