I used to think that there was just one way to live my life; Set goals and then doggedly pursue them. I would ask myself: What do I want? What kind of house do I want to live in? What kind of job do I want to have? What kind of relationships do I want for myself? Concealed within this lifestyle is an illusion (delusion?) that I am in control. If I do all the right things, life will present me with all that I wish for. When I didn't get all that I wanted, I assumed that I was "doing it wrong." I tried harder. It was an endless treadmill. Exhausting.
Lately, I have been toying with the idea of living without goals. What if I were to accept that I have no way of knowing what life will send my way. I am not in control. Instead of rigidly trying to control my circumstances, what if I maintained a stance of open acceptance? What if I got off the treadmill and graciously responded to life instead? Being with what is.
I am at one of those natural transitions in life: graduation is upon me. People sometimes ask me what I plan to do next. If I am honest I say that I am just waiting to see what opportunities the universe sends my way. I know it sounds a little wu wu. What is the alternative? I am reminded of the line from The Graduate. As the main character contemplates his future, a friend of his parents tells him, "I hear there is a great future in plastics."
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