Friday, July 30, 2010

Day 211

Tensions have been running a little high around our house lately. In many ways our lifestyle is low-key and tranquil. Occasionally the normal stresses of life flare up and threaten that tranquility.

A few days ago Bill and I were having a little debate over something meaningless. The external conflict seemed to provide a way for each of us to act out our internal conflicts and the dialogue become much more heated than the topic warranted. We were both obviously frustrated and uncomfortable.

Suddenly, I started to think about eating. I wasn't imagining any particular food and I'm not even sure I was hungry but just thinking about the act of eating soothed me. Children learn self-soothing, stress-reduction strategies at a very early age. Mine was eating.

I am slowly learning to replace this strategy with a new one. Avoiding the discomfort is no longer an option. I have to learn to sit with it and follow it through to the other side.

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