I sometimes feel like Andy Rooney, "You know what bugs me..." I am, perhaps, a little sensitive to certain social proclivities. Blogging has given me a great way to process all of those thoughts about what's happening in my little world.
Take yesterday, for example. I am taking an online workshop for potential dissertation mentors (you can imagine how exciting that is). I found myself frustrated and angry over just how "phony" the other students were in the discussion forum. They were like little robots only saying what they were expected to say. There was little presence of mind or original thought.
This has been a "hot button" issue for me since I was a kid. Shakespeare (not to be confused with Sarah Palin) said, "All the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players." It seems to me that once they are given their scripts few people stop to question.
I suppose that my frustration over the phoniness I see around me is tied to my need for authenticity and honesty. I get angry because other people are reflecting back to me something about myself. I long to be honest and authentic, to act from the present moment, but I am often afraid. There is safety in acting my part and repeating my lines. It is hard to go off script.
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