Yesterday I went out to lunch with a friend. We ate at this funky Greek restaurant on Main street. I was pleased that she seemed to appreciate the funkiness as much as I do. This is a new friendship and we are still learning new things about each other. In the process there are sometimes those awkward moments when the conversation appears to be momentarily dead.
There was at least one of those moments yesterday. I panicked, my mind racing. "How will I fill the empty space?" I thought. I let out some weird little sigh (or was it a moan?). I felt my face contort into a strange expression. I said the first thing that popped into my tortured little mind. I don't remember what. It could have been, "So, do you like turnips?" I'm sure it was less than charming.
I would like to bring a little more grace to these situations. I would like to stop and observe what is happening. Pause to ask, "Where did the energy go?" Wait...breath...wait...allow the energy to return to the conversation. If it doesn't, perhaps I need to ask, "What is most alive for me right now?" I could choose to share or I could ask my friend, "What is most alive for you right now?"
Connecting around what is most alive for us is the key to authentic connection. I have been practicing for years and sometimes I feel like I am in the kindergarten class of the School for Authentic Connection. Bring on the finger paints.
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